Quotations about Sex III

Why should we take advice on sex from the pope? If he knows anything about it, he shouldn't! ~George Bernard Shaw

I thank God I was raised Catholic, so sex will always be dirty. ~John Waters


For women the best aphrodisiacs are words. The G-spot is in the ears. He who looks for it below there is wasting his time. ~Isabel Allende


Sex without love is an empty experience, but as empty experiences go it's one of the best. ~Woody Allen


Sex between a man and a woman can be absolutely wonderful - provided you get between the right man and the right woman. ~Woody Allen


Literature is mostly about having sex and not much about having children; life is the other way around. ~David Lodge, The British Museum Is Falling Down, 1965


Masturbation: the primary sexual activity of mankind. In the nineteenth century it was a disease; in the twentieth, it's a cure. ~Thomas Szasz


We have reason to believe that man first walked upright to free his hands for masturbation. ~Lily Tomlin


An intellectual is a person who's found one thing that's more interesting than sex. ~Aldous Huxley


The big difference between sex for money and sex for free is that sex for money usually costs less. ~Brendan Francis, Playboy, 1985


The art of procreation and the members employed therein are so repulsive, that if it were not for the beauty of the faces and the adornments of the actors and the pent-up impulse, nature would lose the human species. ~Leonardo da Vinci


I know nothing about sex, because I was always married. ~Zsa Zsa Gabor


Desire is in men a hunger, in women only an appetite. ~Mignon McLaughlin, The Neurotic's Notebook, 1960

The hypothalamus is one of the most important parts of the brain, involved in many kinds of motivation, among other functions. The hypothalamus controls the "Four F's": fighting, fleeing, feeding, and mating. ~Unknown psychology professor in neuropsychology course


Sex at age ninety is like trying to shoot pool with a rope. ~George Burns


It is not sex that gives the pleasure, but the lover. ~Marge Piercy


Sudden acquaintance brings repentance. ~Thomas Fuller


A chicken and an egg are lying in bed. The chicken is smoking a cigarette with a satisfied smile on its face and the egg is frowning and looking put out. The egg mutters to no one in particular, "I guess we answered that question." ~Author Unknown


Love is a matter of chemistry, but sex is a matter of physics. ~Author Unknown


Sex got me into trouble from the age of fifteen: I'm hoping that by the time I'm seventy I'll straighten it out. ~Harold Robbins


Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. ~Mignon McLaughlin, The Neurotic's Notebook, 1960

Conservatives say teaching sex education in the public schools will promote promiscuity. With our education system? If we promote promiscuity the same way we promote math or science, they've got nothing to worry about. ~Beverly Mickins


Nature abhors a virgin - a frozen asset. ~Clare Booth Luce

A widespread taste for pornography means that nature is alerting us to some threat of extinction. ~J.G. Ballard, "News from the Sun," Myths of the Near Future, 1982


You know, of course, that the Tasmanians, who never committed adultery, are now extinct. ~W. Somerset Maugham, The Bread-Winner

Sex: the thing that takes up the least amount of time and causes the most amount of trouble. ~John Barrymore


It is not economical to go to bed early to save the candles if the result is twins. ~Chinese Proverb


Chastity: The most unnatural of the sexual perversions. ~Aldous Huxley, Eyeless in Gaza, 1936


He no play-da-game. He no make-a-da rules! ~Earl Butz, referring to the Pope's stricture against contraception


Obscenity is whatever gives the Judge an erection. ~Author Unknown


The only thing wrong with being an atheist is that there's nobody to talk to during an orgasm. ~Author Unknown


Out upon it, I have lov'd
Three whole days together;
And am like to love three more,
If it prove fair weather.
~John Suckling

Love ain't nothing but sex misspelled. ~Harlan Ellison


Being with a woman all night never hurt no professional baseball player. It's staying up all night looking for a woman that does him in. ~Casey Stengel

Sex: the pleasure is momentary, the position ridiculous, and the expense damnable. ~Lord Chesterfield

Virginity can be lost by a thought. ~St. Jerome


The tragedy is when you've got sex in the head instead of down where it belongs. ~D.H. Lawrence


Men reach their sexual peak at eighteen. Women reach theirs at thirty-five. Do you get the feeling that God is playing a practical joke? ~Rita Rudner


Pornography is supposed to arouse sexual desires. If pornography is a crime, when will they arrest makers of perfume? ~Richard Fleischer


Instruction in sex is as important as instruction in food; yet not only are our adolescents not taught the physiology of sex, but never warned that the strongest sexual attraction may exist between persons so incompatible in tastes and capacities that they could not endure living together for a week much less a lifetime. ~George Bernard Shaw, Everybody's Political What's What, 1944

Were kisses all the joys in bed,
One woman would another wed.
~William Shakespeare, Sonnets to Sundry Notes of Music, IV